Zach Galifianakis and Steve Carell.... amazing.

Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis: Steve Carell from Between Two Ferns

A great perspective on San Francisco...

Everyone has a morning ritual. On most days I take the shuttle into work. On the rare day I get to drive down to work, I savor it. Unlike most people - I love driving. There is nothing like coffee in hand, air conditioned (or heated) car and your dial tuned to your favorite radio station, which in my case, is NPR. I love listening to NPR in the morning, and on Tuesday I got to hear an interesting piece in NPR's "Perspectives" series. 

Here in the bay area - the Perspectives series features local authors who present their perspectives on different topics. Today's was especially interesting - it was a perspective presented by Debbie Duncan, an author of children's books who lives on the peninsula. She provided some interesting insight on the topic of the abbreviation of San Francisco (i.e. SF, San Fran, Frisco). Its a discussion point I've heard several times in the three years I've been living here in the bay. Listen for yourself and see what you think!

First, It Was 'Frisco'
Now, according to Debbie Duncan, it's "San Fran." And the verbal virus must be stopped.

By Debbie Duncan

Has this happened recently to you? You're on a flight bound for San Francisco, and the pilot comes over the loudspeaker and announces you will be arriving in "San Fran" at such-and-such a time? Or you read a tweet asking about the weather in "San Fran?" (It's summer. It's foggy. Why do you ask? And if you want to save characters in your 140 limit, use the letters "SF." It's shorter.)

Even some recent transplants call their new home "San Fran." At times like these I'm reminded of the old Herb Caen header, "Don't Call it Frisco," and want to shout "Don't call it San Fran!"

Where did "San Fran" come from, anyway? I blame Southern California, or SoCal, as they like to call it. SoCal is where "the I-5 meets the 405 on the way to the PCH in the O.C." I grew up in Orange County, not the "OC," the title of a TV show, for heaven's sake. I wrote to the author of an (otherwise) terrific book for young adults set in a near-future San Francisco, complaining about his characters hopping on "the BART." THE BART??? He acknowledged the error and said he'd written the book while living in Los Angeles. I knew it! There's no hope of Northern California breaking away from the South, but must we allow them to invade our language?

"NorCal" doesn't grate on me as much as "San Fran," or a "the" tacked onto every freeway or form of public transportation. It's used in youth sports leagues. My daughters tell me there's another term teens are using: "the Bay," instead of the "Bay Area." Well, if someone told me she's "from the Bay," I'd be tempted to ask if she'd toweled off when she got out of the water. Or: Are you amphibious?

Newspapers, long may they live, still use "Calif." for our state instead of the unkind-to-look-at, dreadful-to-pronounce two-letter abbreviation, capital C, capital A, which is really appropriate only on snail mail. It was invented by the U.S. Postal Service for its address reading machines, and to make room for ZIP codes on envelopes.

San Francisco is a mellifluous, historic name. It honors our state's cultural heritage. Don't decapitate it. Don't call it "San Fran."

With a Perspective, I'm Debbie Duncan.

five things that I'm too short to do...

1. Fly an F-16 fighter jet in the air force

Everyone who has ever seen Top Gun has dreamed of being a fighter jet pilot. Forget the BMW, Porsche or even the Ducati, there is nothing like seeing a man suited up standing next to an F-16 fighter jet. Unparalleled chick magnet. Now while it may not be a "dude magnet" - seeing as I am a girl - I do feel that it is a the perfect accompaniment to my diagnosis of a "Napoleon complex". Nothing gives you the feeling of power and control then having surface to air missiles literally at your fingertip. While searching for some information related to something totally different - I noticed when I typed "height requirement" into Google one of my options that was suggested was "height requirements for air force" - so of course out of curiosity I checked it out - and low and behold - you need to be 64 inches to be a pilot. I don't know why I was even moderately surprised. Damn. If I could have only been 5'4!

2. Fit in a landscape photo with anyone taller then 6'2:

My roommate in college was 5'11, we always looked really strange in photos together. My boyfriend is 6'1 (I think) and we also look strange standing in photos together. So if you are short and want to try and mitigate this problem here are my suggestions:

• Always take photos sitting down, this is generally my rule of thumb. See if you can get the taller chair.
• Get the photo from knees up - and stand on a ledge, curb or step (wait for a later posting about the short persons secret weapon - curbs)
• Heels - though this doesn't always work - My highest heel gets me to 5'4. And in reality, I have to be stationary in them. There have been many a photos where right before the picture is taken i take a tumble onto my face - this probably has to do with my lack of balance and general klutz-ery but I usually deflect the blame and point out the fact that heels more then two inches mess with my center of gravity. Physics - its your fault.

3. Be a professional runway model:

Lets not kid ourselves. I never actually thought that I would be able to be a runway model. As a kid, I did ask my dad if it would be possible - my dad, who is 5'6 - broke out laughing. Though what was a bit on the surprising side - I'm too short to even be a petite model. Apparently most petite models are at least 5'3'. This is why I call shenanigans on 'petite' being politically correct for all short people.  Sigh - children's clothing here I come. 

4. Donate sperm

Aw damn. And that was my backup plan for financing my children's education. Most sperm banks have height requirements for sperm donation - and its usually taller then 5'. It seems that sperm banks are systematically making sure that smaller people won't repopulate. This reeks of heightisim. Get that squiggly red line away Chrome - "heightisim" IS a word. 

5. Be an OR (Operating Room) nurse

This one was kinda surprising. I can't get 100% validity on this one - but from some of the things I have read  - apparently there is a height requirement of 5'2 to be able to see over the operating table... take that mom and dad - I knew there was a reason I never wanted to be a surgeon. I'll just stick to the board game.

Probably the best political strategy that I've heard...

Birthday Week

I had quite a fun week - my birthday was last Tuesday. Even though the day was spent in the air flying back to San Francisco from home (Rochester, NY) it ended in a delicious dinner, free dessert and a serenade from three handsome Italian waiters at my favorite restaraunt in San Francisco - E' Tutto Qua. 

Delicious E' Tutto Qua Banana Tiramasu

On Saturday my wonderful boyfriend Scott threw me a birthday party at my most favorite bar in San Francisco - Kennedy's Irish Pub and Curry House. This is my second annual party (one in 2008, one in 2010 - I was traveling in 2009 on my birthday). 

My 2008 birthday celebration - photo credit Jess Loves Cupcakes

Many of my friends came out to help me celebrate and it was great to see everyone! I love the great mix of amazing indian food, fantastic beer selection and big buck hunter. Big buck hunter is my dark dirty secret - its my favorite bar game, the most right wing, republican part of me!

Photo from 2008 birthday celebration - photo credit Jess Loves Cupcakes

Sunday was spent cheering España in the world cup. We tried to go to Public House but got there a bit too late and ended up at Momo's instead - which was fine by me as it is one of the places I've wanted to go since moving to SF. Not being a huge soccer fan to begin with - my allegiance to España came from my wonderful memories of my 2006 Barcelona trip. I know its a crappy way to pick a team to root for - but looks like it ended up being the right choice.


The only bad part about Momo's was the fact that we had to sit at a tallboy table. What's so bad about a tallboy table? The chairs. The average tallboy stool is made for a person who can comfortably sit on it - and possibly rest one foot on the ground. Not so much for those of us who are vertically challenged like yours truly. Little do you know how uncomfortable it is to swing your feet like a 5 year old. Cute as it is - all the blood rushes to your ankles. Insta-cankle. Not fun. Boooo chairs that are too tall... Hooray Beer!